There are a few things I am certain about in life: (1) Maroon 5 would kill for the new Olly Murs song, Troublemaker. (2) Flashcards are the greatest use of paper known to man. And (3) The only thing uglier than road rage is a tuna fish with a mustache.
I’ve never understood road rage. Nothing says “You best believe I’m willing to get in an accident over this feud” better than angrily tailing someone’s butt. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had my fair share of indignant moments when someone does something utterly pointless like speed up when they see I’m trying to slide into their lane. It’s so infuriating because its so trivial. Why bother to do that other than to be rude?
But the outraged yelling, the hand gestures, the maniacal driving in response to being cut off…It’s just too much. If you can do something really impressive with that anger, like turning into the Hulk or something, then I guess you have good reason to show it off. I personally can’t pull off the intimidating green giant look, so instead I tend to make light of the situation and sarcastically compliment them on their creative driving. “Well done, I’m sure your parents have been waiting all your life for you to evolve into the dauntless driver that you are. See you at the next stop light!” “Wow, did not see you coming without your blinker there. You’re wise to use the element of surprise; I’ve heard it also works remarkably well when sneaking up on angry bears.”